It's a matter of habit and choice

I have been too busy with random things that all these rubbish-cool events have been piling up my head and disappearing behind truckloads of broadbeans and ice cream. There have been many significant cool stuff happening over the course of x weeks, and I don't even know where to begin?!

I was looking through pictures and I guess my pictures before the (faux) explosion is a good place to begin, such cute images. :D will only post the one with jacob, ju, jean and me innit because it's less pictures to go.

so cute.

Anyway, recently I have been preoccupied with pointless things like painting rainbows and singing musical notes out a straw. but really, I'm somewhat worried that I'm busying myself with things that aren't as important as maybe, my grades. For one, I haven't been giving a shit about lessons, it's so easy to detach myself from what the teacher is saying and that worries me. Coming home is just a good long rest for me too, and revision never ever crosses my mind. Every time I do think of revision though, the thought kind of scares me because there's so much to do (and I know this is why I should begin revision soon) and I don't know where to begin. I spend my time browsing facebook, reading other people's blogs, admiring/gawking at the people on lookbook.nu, tumblr... maybe reading?

(okay on hindsight, I do listen in class most of the time but I never revise. really.)

so what I'm worried about is that by the time I realise how little time I have left it's going to be too late. and right now, look what I'm doing again. procrastinating. I should really be filing my chinese shit right now. but I can't even find a decent hole puncher at home because I left the good one in school (yes, the one you've been using. the seemingly ownerless one.) I'll just bring all the worksheets to school tomorrow to show her I tried... which is true. I sat and tried to hole punch everything till I realised the hole puncher was crap.

As it is I have not enough time. YOG rehearsals begin in a week. I'm verrrry excited but for some reason, at this moment, I feel very detached from it all. What am I even supposed to be doing? I don't really want to screw up I want to make this good...

we had a long weekend, national day holiday, but I didn't do anything productive. I wasted the time away at marina bay sands (which is not to say I did not enjoy it. I enjoyed it tremendously) and it feels inappropriate. sometimes I just think that it would be so much easier not to care about my studies... BUT I CAN'T. it's innate.

damn.